Many stories of Grandma in her later years involved the police.

Once when taking a nap she woke up to find that when she opened her curtain in her room, she had a bullet hole in window. The police were called and in true W****gan fashion, five squad cars responded to the call.

Another time, and now a true classic: a police car pulled up to the house. Now, anyone else would be mildly curious. However, Julia #1, ran about the house shrieking “Polizia! Polizia!,” fearing deportation (we think) or Gestapo tactics. The officer at the door explained that there was a tense hostage situation in the neighborhood and it would be best if the ladies left. Grandma, in her best matriarchal voice, “But VEE have NO place to go!” (Remember her thick German accent.) The officer told them to stay away from the back windows.

What did they do? Go sit at the kitchen table – to look out the back window and watch the activity.

An hour later, when things heated up, there was a knock on the door. The officer insisted they leave (probably having seen them through the windows). Grandma again claimed they had no place to go. So Officer Slick Thinking radioed for a paddy wagon and it took Grandma and not hysterical Julia #1 to the police station for their own protection. That lasted an hour until Grandma decided she’d had enough, and Julia #1 probably fainted by this time. The paddy wagon made its return trip and the ladies returned to their favorite pastime – staring out the back window. Until hours later, the hostage situation was resolved. No one was harmed.

But the image of Grandma with Julia in tow climbing into the back of paddy wagon cracks a smile on the gloomiest of days.

So when you need a character, sometimes you don’t have to look too far. Your files contain some pretty colorful ones already. Whether they are the crazy aunt (an early post) or the German Grandma who tried to feed you bad fruit cocktail, or the Uncle who expected you to kiss his ring (a future post, I promise!); all these characters are just a memory away.

Keep on writing!